Diary of a holiday guest

Mandie - aka Revodana's Manhattan's Transfer - is staying over for Christmas and even if he has stayed here before I do believe he is writing a secret diary - to present to his mum when he gets back home:
day one (Dec 23rd) I arrived rather late in the evening (mum said something about a broken car?) and of course all those crazy Lewanika dogs was barking their heads off when I arrived, I got a bit frightened, especially as that Sammy was telling me to p... off right away and not even think of returning. Not nice, and I would have liked to follow her advice but mum just wouldnt listen!
But then suddenly I noticed that Sammy was actually a rather lovely bitch, who smelled really nice and I mean - bitches are supposed to be ... bitchy? and she isnt really, if I am not "stupid boy" I can lie really close to her, with my head on her back.
The other dogs were fine right from start - I mean, I KNOW that the old guy Yankee will kill me if I step out of line, so of course I dont and then he just ignores me, and the little one Funny is really a lot of fun - but why do they throw the two of us out of the house all the time? something silly about not playing indoors? do they know how cold it is to play outdoors?
But the humans!!!!! they are NUTS. I had hardly arrived before they dragges a huge tree all the way through the house and stuck it up in the middle of the living room? WHY? not because I was supposed to lift my leg there, I am certain of that. Because shortly after they started putting all sorts of weird stuff like candles on it.
The next day was a bit better - I mean, when someone is cooking a goose SOMETHING at least have to fall off to a diligent dog? and then in the afternoon lots and lots of wonderful people arrived - and more dogs? dont they think they have enough? but no! Funnys brother, a six months old total terror arrived, FINALLY someone I could put right - which I did, boys like him has to learn who is in charge.
But the humans - I mean they are nice enough, and the food is brilliant - but all of a sudden they started walking around that tree and singing???? never in my life..... fortunately they sat down soon after and ate some more, which was good because then I could finally relax.
More cooking and more people the next day, lots more, and someone had been nice enough to wrap some wonderful cookies in nice paper and put it under the tree, which was a really nice surprise for us dogs.... weird that the humans sort of started shouting when they found the paper, did they expect us to eat that too?



Today has been almost NORMAL if such a thing exist here? no new people and a very nice run on the fields and a long walk sniffing deer tracks. And lots of playing (out doors again - dont they know it is freezing?) with Sammy and Funny, and even Yankee joined in a couple of times, but ouch I really have to remember that I am not the resident male here, he does something nasty with his lips when I forget.